The American Adventure - Vol 24

1 - 31 May 99

If you want to go straight to Vol 25, you may do so now!

...

The first event of the month was the very special Coral Sea Dinner. This dinner celebrates the victory of the USN and RAN over the Japanese Imperial Navy in the Battle of the Coral Sea, an event that is only commemorated with a dinner in America. In 1942, the Japanese had been planning a big lunge into Australia but fortunately the US had recently broken the code that the Japanese were using in their radio communications and the Allies uncovered their big invasion plans. An ambush was set up and a big battle ensued with the Japanese losing some vital aircraft carriers. Some say that this battle had a critical role in the war in that the Japanese were never able to move further south and the Battle of the Coral Sea weakened their forces prior to another important battle that happened shortly after - the Battle of Midway.

To celebrate, the Naval Attaché's office holds a sort of mess dinner (this year in the Embassy Atrium). Unfortunately it is not possible to have a proper mess dinner because some of the essential elements are not available (stewards who know what they are doing, for example) but we try to make it as authentic as possible. The dinner was in the form of a Ladies Dine In and all the Navy people who live in or around the Washington area got to invite an American couple. We invited Ray Fuller, an absolutely enormous African American guy who works at the Navy International Programs Office.

Tim had invited Ray's predecessor (Bob Selekman) the previous year but Bob had not turned up. He didn't even let Tim know that he wasn't coming, he just rang up the person co-ordinating the RSVPs and declined. Ray is a lot more fun than Bob Selekman was and a lot more reliable (and somewhat less religious) so it was great that he was able to come. The only problem (there's always a problem) was that Ray is a single man. He used to be married but got divorced or something and he is without a girlfriend. So ... we had to arrange something for him. In Tim's words, - Don't worry Ray, we'll find you a loose woman! Well, perhaps a spare woman.

Tim asked around the office to see if anyone knew of someone in the right age bracket (although he doesn't look it, Ray is in his post-40 years). At first, it looked like there wasn't going to be much success in this little search but then he asked Andy Mierisch if there was anyone that he or Karen could think of. Andy thought of someone immediately, a woman that Karen worked with who would be just perfect - comes from Jamaica, sings Jazz in band, intelligent, beautiful, a lot of fun and currently single (this is a common problem for intelligent professional women in Washington - there is a shortage of men who are able to cope with the idea of a successful woman). When she turned up on the night she was precisely as advertised and we all had a great time during the meal.

There were a few complaints about the meal (not from us but from some other, more conservative, Australians) because the lamb was not cooked Australian style, in other words it was rare. Still, for those of us with more discerning palates who liked lamb, it was very nice. Ray, being the big hunk that he is, was able to eat Kajsa's lamb as well.

We spent the next day at the Goddard Space Flight Control Center in Maryland. They had an open day and it was packed. Unfortunately we got there a little later in the afternoon than planned so we missed some of the good stuff like the puppet show (Puppets in Space) but we were able to watch some enthusiasts fire off rockets, actually they were scale models of rockets but it was a bit of fun for a while. The only problem was that it got a lot colder than expected during the afternoon. Earlier in the day it had been beautiful and we dressed appropriately in shorts and t-shirts. When we got to Goddard, it suddenly turned cold and windy and we were freezing.

After the open day, we went to Micke and Chatarina's for a barbecue (where we were still cold!) It was the normal Swedish crowd plus a few ring-ins. Lots and lots of kids running around shouting at each other.

During the following week, Kalle was the VIP at school. This is a tricky way of saying he had to help the teacher with things like cleaning the blackboard and emptying the bins. It does also mean that he got to take Winnie the Pooh home for the week and had to fill in a couple of pages of Pooh's journal. There is a lot of parent involvement in schools here - not always voluntarily. Sometimes there is stuff sent home with a polite note that pretty much says "Do this by tomorrow morning or everyone will know that you are the worst parents in class!" Part of the big homework debate that is raging over here is the issue of too much homework for the kids.

There is so much homework and it is often so hard that parents are being forced to sit down for an hour or more each night and help their children - and that's not counting the regular science projects, etc. For busy parents who have precious little time to get things done at home, this is a big stress contributor. We certainly will not be pushing Kalle to do lots of homework next semester - he's a kid, kids should be out and about making mischief not sitting a desk all day and then coming home to put in another couple of hours of study. (Note that this is Tim's point of view, getting out and about making mischief worked perfectly well for him up to and including University so why can't it be so for Kalle?)

Anyway, off the hobbyhorse. Pooh came with us to China King for dinner on Tuesday evening and was very impressed by the reasonably priced and quite good food.

A couple of days later saw the triumphant return of Petra and Hans from the Bahamas. Kalle was very happy to see Max and Taltarni was happy to see this girl that she vaguely recalled as Hannah. We went over to their house for pizza on the Friday evening but in the planning process pizza strangely mutated into sausages. No matter, they tasted good and it was good to catch up with the Mosbergs after a couple of months.

The weekend was quiet, in that there was nothing big planned, and busy, in that regular things like Swedish School and soccer took up plenty of time. We also had a picnic with Hans and Petra over in the grounds of Wolf Trap. It was a beautiful evening and we were almost totally alone there. There were a few rabbits around and later a couple of kids appeared from nowhere and kept Kalle and Max entertained with an ad hoc soccer game. Tim also saw some sort of pigmy rabbit thing. It looked just like a small rabbit but with small ears and it didn't seem to be a baby rabbit (it was by itself). It was quite fearless and Tim almost stood on it before noticing that it was there.

The next evening, Tim took Tasha out for a walk (this is unusual, normally Kajsa gets to take Tasha out in the evenings whereas Tim has to get his walk in during lunch - usually with a wander around the White House). It was another great evening to be out for a walk and he saw quite a few animals, which really brought home the fact that Spring was here. First he saw some goslings down at the lake. He was going to take Tasha by there but changed his mind, not that Tasha wouldn't have enjoyed it, just that it would have turned nasty pretty quickly.

Instead he walked up to the end of Vernon Drive and skirted around the grounds of the company on the other side of Towlston (the same company that we have been kicked out of before). At the back there is a couple of large fields of grass that seem to be totally unattended. It is a good spot to let Tasha off for a run because she can chase rabbits and, if she is lucky, deer. On the way there, Tim was suddenly startled by a growl and a blur of red amongst the trees. It was a fox that had drawn their attention and bolted, the behaviour many animals exhibit when protecting young so Tim assumed that there must have been some fox cubs. Oh, well, can't let Tasha off just yet!

They walked on a little further before Tim let Tasha off. He stood there for quite a while, just taking in the ambiance while checking out the deer who were too distant for Tasha to see (and they seemed oblivious to her). This ability to a take an evening stroll and be at one with nature will be sorely missed when we return to Australia, unless of course we can live in the country outside Canberra and see wildlife like kangaroos and snakes and more kangaroos and more snakes and so forth. The last wildlife he saw that night was on the X-Files.

Tim and Kajsa took off on a special little holiday the next week. Tim had to travel to Halifax, Nova Scotia for a deadly boring conference on acoustics. The positive thing was that it was in Halifax and the airfare there was not that unreasonable, so Kajsa was able to arrange to meet him there on the Thursday evening and stay over the weekend - without the kids! This was our first long weekend without kids in a long long time and we made the most of it.

Of course, events like this can't happen without a disaster. Fortunately, in this case, the disaster was minor. Kajsa managed to make it to Halifax, it was just that her bags didn't. She had had a very short stop in Toronto and had not been able to get her bags through customs, she just made a mad dash for the connecting flight which took off a minute or two after she arrived at the gate.

We were pleasantly surprised by the attitude of the Air Canada baggage handlers. They didn't have attitude, they had a customer focus and nothing was too much trouble for them. By the time we got to the hotel after having dinner in a nice little seafood restaurant (Salty's) Kajsa's bags were waiting for her. That wouldn't have happened in the US!

The next day Tim made a short visit to the conference area to look at some industry displays while Kajsa took the opportunity to take a leisurely bath. Fortunately, the industry displays were not very extensive and Tim was able to get through them all in an hour and a half, after which he rushed back to hotel to be with the love of his life. Unfortunately, the love of his life had locked him out of the hotel room. She was inside, lying on the bed, listening to some new CDs that Tim had bought and couldn't hear the knocking. Assuming that Kajsa was still in the bath, Tim sat outside, reading the paper for almost an hour before she finally unlocked the door.

By this time, it was time for lunch so we took a walk down to the harbour. We grabbed something to eat in a little restaurant on a pier and then went off to have a massage. Actually it was two simultaneous massages, but you get the idea.

During their walk to and from lunch, Kajsa and Tim had been talking about faithfulness. It was one of those discussions which goes along the lines of "I can't imagine myself being unfaithful, it's scary in a way, but I can't." This is Kajsa. Tim, doing what his nature insists that he must, is looking around at all the spring dressed women (about to spring out of their dresses), just mumbles "Oh, but I can." - What was that? "Nothing dear, what were you saying again?"

The discussion got on to nature. Kajsa was stating that there are many examples of monogamous behaviour in wildlife. Geese, for example, and ducks. Tim couldn't help quoting some recent article he had read which talked about how many of the apparently faithful animals frequently get a bit on the side. In fact, in some species, the surest indicator that you are not the father of a child is that your partner is the mother of it (because she's been regularly bonking every other guy in town while you've been shagging as many females as will let you). But Kajsa was adamant, not geese and ducks.

These strong relationships had been very much apparent when we had gone to the local lake (just around the corner about five minutes walk with short legs, not Tim's, the kids'). We went to see the goslings that Tim had seen on his walk with Tasha. When we got there we saw that the goslings were out on the water so we walked around the edge of the lake to see them better, right into an area being protected by two nesting geese. The first we knew of it was when the gander came storming over to let us know we weren't welcome.

Tim has a thing about geese. When he was very little - like three or four - his parents had had geese at their property in Western Australia and they were mean (the geese, not his parents). The strongest recollection Tim has of this period in his life is from when he was being chased around the house by an enormous goose (remember he, Tim, was little and his memory is of relative size).

It is worth noting that geese are notorious for attacking people when they are protecting young. Tim was very conscious of the fact that he was the only thing standing between our young and a madly protective goose that was coming rapidly towards us!

He did the first thing that came into his head.

If you've seen The Gods Must be Crazy II, you'll recall that when the little child who was lost in the desert was being chased by the jackal, the only thing that saved him (was he a him?) was remembering that the jackal won't attack anything bigger than itself. So the child picked up a stick or something and held it above his head.

This is what came to mind: "Look really big!"

So Tim stood there with his arms outstretched as far as possible, standing on one foot with the other foot stretched out towards the goose (very much like the crane pose on the pole in the Karate Kid) and began talking to the goose about how they weren't going to hurt each other. Strange as it may sound, they soon seemed to come to a reasonable agreement. The goose wouldn't trust Tim and Tim wouldn't trust the goose but neither would make the first move to attack.

Once they came to this agreement, we had a pleasant time just watching the geese and the goslings. It got a bit hairy at one point when one family came right up to Tim and Kalle so that they were no more than an arm reach from the babies. The parents were extremely wary and kept a very close eye on them but the non-aggression pact held. It was a very special moment.

The point of all this, however, is that the parent geese worked very closely together, the gander protecting both the mother and the goslings and the mother protecting and herding the goslings. There were also a couple of ducks who were waddling around the lake but there were no babies at that time. In the whole time we were there the ducks never strayed further than a metre from each other. The geese who weren't nesting (the ones with goslings rather than eggs) never got more than two metres apart. The only reason the nesting gander left the nest was to protect his nest from us. (Unfortunately it seems that he wasn't so successful against gravity. More recently when we went back, we saw that one egg appeared to have rolled in the water and was visible a couple of metres out. Very sad, but there are two surviving goslings.)

We need to get back to where we were, walking around in Halifax.

Our conversation about faithfulness had been interrupted by lunch and then by the massage. We had come back into town and we were checking out a park that Kajsa had wanted to stroll around, looking at all the flowers. Daffodils and tulips and the like were just coming out so it was very pretty. In addition to the flowers, the park was also populated by a large number of ducks. It was amazing, every single female duck had her very solicitous mate in tow. There were duck couples everywhere. The females were all very heavy with eggs (in the following weeks there must have been upwards of a hundred ducklings in the park).

With all this evidence at hand, Kajsa brought up the faithfulness conversation again. Tim remembered a useful fact at that time, basically that of all the species of animals that exist, only a tiny fraction of them have been observed when it comes to mating behaviour. He used this fact to support his claim that examples from the natural world could easily be unrepresentative and open to misinterpretation when trying to determine what is common, or "natural", behaviour.

As we wandered further into the park we noted that the only ducks which didn't appear to be securely paired up were the young ducks and a very bitter looking bunch of bachelor drakes. It certainly seemed like there was no support for the claim that faithfulness is not standard, at least where ducks are concerned.

After a while we both needed to go to the washroom (Canadian for toilet). We happened to be close to a pretty bridge at the time and we decided to meet there (the male and female facilities were in different parts of the park). The gents were closer so, once he'd finished his business, Tim had a bit of extra time on his hands and he spent it standing on the bridge, watching all the birds waddling around.

Now recall the recurring discussion about faithfulness. It certainly seemed that the ducks were very committed to each other, they almost seemed to be connected by an invisible rope. There was a very cute moment when a mother-to-be duck wandered up to about a metre from Tim and her little drake "husband" fussed around her to keep her away from the big potential threat.

Imagine his surprise and shock when a rogue drake took this opportunity to leap across a little ravine, rush up to the female duck and start having his way with her - right in front of her partner. And in front of Tim. "Observe this mating behaviour, you bastard!"

You could almost see the little drake's thoughts - "Er, excuse me. Sir? Um, this is my wife. Er, would you mind? Sir, excuse me. I'd be ever so grateful if you would stop bonking my wife, she is pregnant you know. Ooh, this really is a violation!" Being very much a gentleman drake he didn't squawk or make huge fuss. He just tried to interpose himself in the event half-heartedly and flustered around the edges. Sort of like the way a human husband tries to get a drunk wife away from a very serious debate so he could take her home from a party.

In the meantime the female was going "Oooh, give it to me, big boy!" - totally oblivious to the distress of her mate.

This was shocking enough but in the next five minutes, that duck got shagged by two other drakes, one of whom appeared to be from another breed. During each violation, her mate tried to stop it from happening but he never got violent, never squawked. He just got distressed. Fortunately, Kajsa was there for the last bonk. Not that she is into watching that sort of thing, just that she would never have believed Tim about the events that had transpired before him.

The strange thing is that, while this particular duck got nailed three times in quick succession, none of the others seemed to be getting any. We're not sure why this was the case but perhaps, in the eyes of drakes, she was a real babe.

After the shocking events in the park, we took a walk up to the Halifax Citadel. The ownership of Nova Scotia exchanged hands a few times between the French and the English and the Citadel was built to keep one or the other out. Apparently it is very nice inside but we got there after it closed so we just walked around the outside of it.

After a brief respite at the hotel (including a session in the jacuzzi) we ventured out again to have dinner. Tim had planned to take Kajsa to a nice restaurant but time had got away from us and the place he'd selected was shutting down just as we got there. Still we saw that it was really beautiful place and we determined that we would certainly make time to get there the next night. We managed to find a Chinese joint that was still open and had our fill of some rather tasty fried rice et cetera.

After dinner we decided that we would check out the nightclubs.

There is nothing like a visit to a nightclub to remind you that you are getting old. Normally, you don't subject yourself to such rude shocks. You hang around with your friends and neighbours and you all age gracefully together. Once you're married, you tend to stop going out to nightclubs altogether. If you're sensible, once you're hitched, you will never visit a nightclub again and you can pretend that you are still as young as everyone else.

We went to a place call JJ somebody or other's which claimed to have two dance floors, one of which played retro. In our deluded minds we thought that that would mean that they would play good music from the 70's and 80's. In their minds, it meant that they would play music from a couple of years ago that sounds very much like the loud dance music that they play today. In any event, it was terrible in the ears of us oldies. We stood there, dinking our V&Ts, appalled at the very low dress standards (noting that we are from the yuppy era when everyone dressed up to go out). Not only that but everyone there looked like they were almost pre-adolescent and that made us look even worse by comparison! We scoffed down our drinks and escaped to another nightclub where we had been told that dinosaurs still known to roam.

"My Apartment" was a huge complex of restaurants, bars and dance floors with the one cover charge. Once we got in we realised that we had come to the right place - there were people who were even older than us there! Very reassuring.

Somewhat less reassuring was the fact that the crowd at this place consisted almost entirely of the divorced and desperate set. Oh well, at least now we know where we'll have to go if disaster strikes our relationship in the future - that in itself should be enough to keep us together!

We quickly found a seat near the bar and took a drink to calm us down after our unsettling experience at the JJ place. Actually, we didn't get up from seat until about half an hour later when we decided we would go back to the hotel. That's us, last of the great party animals! (In our defence it was getting late and was after 1:00 am when we left.)

The next day we did something that as parents, we have not been able to do in years (minds out of the gutter please) - we slept in together, both of us, at the same time. It was a real pleasure to not be forced out of bed at 7 or have the kids jumping on us and whispering "Can I tell you something?" in a stage whisper (usually this absolutely vital information is something along the lines of "I want breakfast!").

Eventually we did get up and made our way south to Peggy's Cove, a quaint little fishing village that has been transformed into a tourist trap. Despite the presence of a gift shop and restaurant, it was a pleasant experience and the views really are quite spectacular. The main product seems to be lobster, with hundreds of lobster pots in view from the spit of rock that Peggy's Cove is founded on. Naturally we had lobster for lunch and it was delicious.

In the afternoon we tried to drive to Annapolis Valley. We used the seer method (reading the signs) and when we finally consulted the oracle (a map) we found that the Valley was a little too far to travel to and from in time so we visited Windsor instead. Windsor's only claim to fame is that it is supposed to have the greatest tidal range in the world. This seems strange given its geographic position and the fact that the river banks weren't that high but it didn't seem worth the effort to argue the point. Perhaps what they meant is that they have the greatest area exposed by the tides which certainly seemed possible.

When we got back to Halifax we visited Pleasant Park for a bit of exercise. We saw many little squirrels and managed to give at least one of them a rude shock. They were all over the place, running around after each other, playing "silly buggers" as Kalle would say! They seemed totally unafraid of humans and came close to disaster a couple of times.

In the evening, we went to the Golden Edge (known by everyone but Kajsa as the "Left Bank Restaurant"). It was superb. Unlike many North American restaurants, the Edge serves excellent food in reasonable quantities rather than reasonable food in ridiculously huge quantities. They also had a very nice Australian wine that we had not tried before but fell in love with. Angove's Cabernet Sauvignon is highly recommended.

After our gastronomic delight, we visited the casino for a little flutter. It wasn't anything amazing but we did manage to walk out with about $2-50 extra in our pockets so you could say that it was a success (at least it was better than walking out with $50 less!)

We slept in again the next day (so civilised to have a check out time of 12 midday!) During the time between leaving the hotel and getting on the plane, we drove up the coast above Dartmouth (which is on the other side of the harbour from Halifax). While there is some spectacular scenery to the north, it really isn't as pretty as what is to the south of Halifax. Nevertheless we enjoyed the drive, stopping off at a little place for a Devonshire Coffee (they didn't know what we were talking about so we had to specifically ask for coffee and scones).

The trip back, although long (it involved an extensive wait in Toronto) was uneventful.

The weather had certainly risen a few degrees during the time we were in Halifax, we spent many evenings on the porch eating dinner and relaxing. We also took the kids down to the lake frequently to check out the progress of the goslings. They are getting used to us now and their parents tend not to be so aggressive, just a little wary when their little ones get to close to us. One time, Tim took Kalle and Max (who was visiting) down to catch some tadpoles. We managed to get about a dozen of them shared between two jars and they have been sitting on the kitchen bench. They were doing fine up until they turned into little tiny frogs at which point they all curled up their toes. No-one is able to explain why they didn't survive the transition. The last remaining tadpoles were returned to the wild so there may be some hope of them surviving.

At the end of the week, Katya from Germany - Meike's sister - arrived. She was another perfect guest who was quiet, neat and brought chocolate.

On the Saturday, Kalle's school had their Spring Picnic. This was a huge affair with cotton candy, hay rides, face painting, bake sales, a book fair, a bouncy castle and the ubiquitous silent auction in which we won a birthday party and a manicure. There was also a noisy auction during which they sold off a couple of trips including one to Hawaii. All up the school made in the order of $12,000 from the day. Much more successful than the previous year! The rest of the day was quiet with Kajsa going off to work and Tim taking the kids to Kalle's soccer game.

Kajsa worked on Sunday too. Tim dropped Kajsa off at work and then took the kids shopping at Costco, which is about a kilometre from Kohls. Costco (also known as Price Club) is a chain of huge warehouse sized stores from which you can buy lots of great stuff, usually in bulk, always at a low price. The problem is that they have so much great stuff that you often walk out having bought significantly more than you expected. On that Sunday and the following week this happened not once, not twice but three times.

Anyway, on Sunday, Tim went in with the idea of looking at some computer stuff and tools and bikes and walked out with two trolleys loaded with stuff (after having a little rest stop for lunch in between). It was an exhausting experience. After he took Kalle to check out more bikes at Bikes USA (who were having their biannual sale) and then to soccer practice, he was completely worn out.

On Monday, Tim was at a conference (Navy 21) and was able to get off early enough to pick Kajsa up at work after which they both headed off for a little more shopping at Costco. Well, a lot of shopping actually. We were trying to look at the bikes. We decided that we would get them as they were a good brand and exceptionally well price (not to mention being a striking colour). Unfortunately we couldn't complete that purchase because they didn't have any saleable bikes in stock. So, the sensible thing to do would have been to turn around and go home, with a plan to come back another day. That is not what happened. Instead we got into a bit of a Costco Procurement Frenzy, ending up with a tent and a pile of golf stuff instead (Tim's birthday and Christmas presents in advance).

After his success at convincing Kajsa to buy him all this neat golf stuff, Tim just had to try it out straight away. When we got home, we rushed through dinner, Tim quickly put the kids to bed and then he sent Kajsa out with Tasha for a walk. Now he could test out his brand new home golf range.

The golf range is amazing for what we (nominally Kajsa) paid for it. You have this huge 2m by 2m net and a little doohicky that can pick up the balls which is called, and I am not making it up, a "golf ball shagger". The "shagger" fits into another doohicky which, with the application of foot pressure, puts the balls on a tee for you, one at a time. An ingenious design.

Of course a 2m by 2m net is not easy to put together by yourself so there was a fair amount of swearing going on as Tim struggled while the sun went down. Finally he did get it all assembled and was able to commence practicing. After the very first swing Tim decided that perhaps it wasn't such a good idea to be hitting golf balls in the front yard right near the road. The ball managed to miss the net. Instead of just confidently whacking the ball, Tim was very conscious of the proximity of the metal doohickey to the tee. He got all tensed up and gave the ball an incredible slice, missing the net by more than two metres. The ball zoomed off and bounced merrily along the road straight towards a neighbour's car. Fortunately there were no witnesses and, from a distance it appeared that there was no damage to the car. Needless to say, Tim was too shamed to go looking for the ball.

We went out to McDonald's with Petra, Max and Hanna the next evening (after another aborted attempt to get the bikes). The reason for the treat was that it was Max' birthday and Petra wanted to take Kalle and Max out. Kalle was very conscious that it was Max' birthday and kept talking about how we have to be nice to the birthday boy. He didn't even seem too worried about the fact that, for a few weeks, Max will be older than him.

Tim finally got to play golf with Staffan on Wednesday. Despite the fact that he is now the proud owner of a home golf range, Tim still managed to get a terrible score. As usual there was much swearing in Swedish, something that Staffan took great pleasure in pointing out later "You know, Tim is fluent in Swedish, at least when it comes to swearing!" One hole in particular was ghastly. Tim would have got at least 15, losing two balls in the process. The only thing that made it alright is that one of the real players managed to hit four balls in the lake from the tee and ended up matching Tim's score (you had to stop at double par so Tim got only 10 for that hole - what a relief!) Staffan did okay but not as well as he has been doing. We came to the conclusion that it must have had something to do with the winter break!

After the game, Tim brought Staffan home and Anna-Carin and Hans and Petra (plus respective kids) came over for a barbie. Hans was a little miffed as someone had written off the front end of his little convertible BMW. Still, he was bearing up much better than we would have been if we had such a nice car and someone damaged it.

Tim had made a comment a couple of days earlier about possibly being able to put the new tent up when Hans and Petra came over. Kalle took this as a cast iron promise and so as soon as he got home, Tim was forced to start erecting the tent in the front yard. Actually it wasn't too hard and with help, Tim had the tent up in less than half an hour. The tent is a good size and he kids loved it, spending almost an hour just running in and out of it. Once we had proved that the tent worked, we took it straight down again. The neighbours must think that we are mad.

The rest of the evening was dedicated to eating and downing beer and cider. Very pleasant. Oh, and Kajsa was very proud of being able to get the Weber going all by herself!

Later in the evening, after everyone had gone, Tim got into a dangerous conversation with Kajsa. She was standing on bed looking at herself in the mirror with her arms above her head.

"Anna-Carin likes this dress but she doesn't think that she could wear one as short as this. Look, when I put my arms above my head like this, it is a little short, but my underwear doesn't show ..."

The conversation wandered into treacherous territory for a while with the bottom line (ha ha) being that Kajsa's bum has been getting big (her words) and that it has more fat on it than it used to.

Kajsa ended up in the bathroom looking at her bum in the mirror. She turned and spoke to Tim, who was lying in bed, trying to be inconspicuous. "Look, I do have a lot more fat on my bum than I used to have!"

At this point of time, loud and very clear words emerged from Taltarni's bedroom.

"NO - I do!"

Both Tim and Kajsa burst into laughter and Tim was thereby miraculously saved from having to make an estimate of how much bigger Kajsa's bum has become (this, as most husbands would be aware, is a very dangerous topic but while we are on it, Kajsa's bum probably about half the size of the average American's.)

According to Kalle the most exciting event of the week was when he brought home a book on the new Star Wars movie from school. Of course, he wanted Tim to read that book as his bed-time story that night which led to some rather surreal conversations.

"What does Empire mean? Is that the Empire?" (Pointing to a shrouded figure.) - No that's the Emperor, he's in charge of the Empire. "Oh."

"What does strike mean?" - To hit someone. "Oh."

You could see cogs turning in his mind and then:

"If an empire is like a country, how can it hit somebody?" - Ah, well, it's the difference between figurative and literal, but you don't know what they mean, do you Kalle? "No."

There were also some mental leaps to be performed to explain why the new film is Episode I and that the first one he saw was Episode IV but that there is no Episode II and III, yet. A very clever marketing ploy! Since then Kalle has got the hang of numbering system and has become an expert on all things Star Wars related. Strange really as he hasn't seen the movie.

Later that night, Tim was watching TV (Kajsa was at work). As normal, he was ignoring Taltarni who, as normal, wasn't going to sleep. He knew that she had been crying but hadn't noticed that the intensity had been increasing. Kalle, on the other hand, did notice. He went into her bedroom, encouraged her to climb out of her bed and brought her downstairs. It was very cute to see the very caring big brother leading the very sad little sister towards their very mean pappa. Taltarni's very sad face was especially cute. Her mouth was completely turned down and her little cheeks were quivering with the indignity of being ignored when she cried out that the light wasn't on. When she had gone to bed there was lots of light from outside but the light had gone with the setting of the sun and Taltarni had got more and more frantic with the increasing dark. Once the light was on and she was back in bed she went to sleep happily enough.

Earlier in the evening, when Tim had taken Taltarni to bed, Kalle had stayed downstairs to finish his dinner. Tim had told Kalle that he needed to eat quickly while Taltarni was being put to bed because time for a story was rapidly running out. Not long after Tim went upstairs, Kalle came up happily saying that he had finished his dinner. This was an amazing turn-around because before, Kalle was just picking listlessly at the meal and complaining that it had green stuff in it.

After Taltarni was in bed, Tim went down to see if Kalle had finished everything and was surprised to see that Kalle's plate was in fact empty.

- So, Kalle, you ate it all? "Yes, I ate it up really quickly, just like this ... " (scoop, scoop) "Hm hm."

When asked what had really happened, a nervous flicker of Kalle's eyes betrayed the real events. His eyes had gone straight to Tasha who was sitting there looking very happy and somewhat hopeful that she might get some more food.

"Promise you won't get angry, pappa?" - Well, I'll try not to get too angry.

Kalle went to bed without desert and Tim spent the next ten minutes trying to hide his enormous smile.

This year, unlike last year, Kajsa remembered our wedding anniversary. At least, this year Kajsa decided to spend the occasion with her husband, rather than going off with her girlfriends to see a soppy movie. We spent the evening with Meike and Katya who came in to Washington to go to Prayers with us. After Prayers, which we stayed at much longer than intended, we went to a Russian restaurant in Georgetown, called the Balalaika or the Baclava or something like that. Anyway, while it was very nice, the Georgetown Russian restaurant is not as posh and upscale as the one in Canberra. The woman there was very Russian and was very keen to sell us stuff, including a full four course meal that was way too much for us. She just seemed to take over the ordering process.

"Ach, vad vould you like, you'll have the blitzes for appetiser, yes. Oh and the chicken, big chicken, you like chicken, course you do, you have the chicken. And borsch, everyone has borsch, you have the borsch. You vant vine, yes, you have vine. This vine from Moldavia, is a dessert vine but some people drink it with their meals, I don't know. You have that vine, here I open it for you. You like, yes."

She was very friendly and as we were the only ones in the restaurant, we got full service. She came up at one point to see how we were doing.

"How is everything? Please, if you don't like it, don't tell me or I cry all night!"

The food was okay but here's a tip for people who like Beef Stroganoff the Australian way - don't bother going to Russia for authenticity. Trust us, it's better the Australian way!

After we escaped from Olga (or whatever her name was), we took Katya on a very brief tour of the city of Washington at night and then made our way back to the relative safety of Great Falls.

The last weekend was a busy one. As usual there was Swedish School in the basement, but this was the last session for the semester. Tim escaped it by heading off to Costco for one last attempt to buy bikes - this time it was successful! Max also had his birthday party in the afternoon at another of these kids amusement places - called the Discovery Zone. Then the house was subjected to cursory cleaning and tidying prior to the party we were hosting the next day.

As this was the last week of Swedish School, we were having a little party for everyone on Sunday evening. Tim also invited his Swedish class (three of whom turned up, with partners) and a couple of people who have Swedish ancestry. It made for an interesting bunch and we ended up having people in the house from about three in the afternoon until ten in the evening so it must have been a roaring success (the last couple of hours are a little hazy - more through fatigue than anything else).

Fortunately the next day was Memorial Day, a public holiday here, so Tim had the day off. This meant that he was available for the chores designated by Kajsa, such as tidying up the house. He also managed to get some important bits for the bikes (like new pumps, puncture kits, lights and a bike computer from Bikes USA) and he supervised the last visit from Max before his family headed off to Germany for a visit the next day). Kajsa worked, of course.